I’m sorry, but I can’t hold back any longer. I see more and more of these videos of people “tricking” on their fixies and it makes me want to scream the popular slogan “THE ONLY COOL TRICK ON A TRACK BIKE IS GOING FAST.”

I have nothing against fixed gear bikes. I think they are great for commuting in the city. Or if you are a true badass, you can try to put more mileage on one than Kris Rhodes, but good luck with that.

I’m just kind of sick of this whole emerging “trick” culture of fixed gear bikes. It’s not really that hardcore. At all. I used to barspin and get more air on a BMX bike when I was in 7th grade. I realize you’re on a track bike with 700c wheels and no freewheel, but if air is what you’re looking for, it just doesn’t compare to the big boys, or even Danny MacAskill.

And bunny-hopping over a curb? Please.